On Physical Health, Emotional Fortitude, and Writing

Currently Listening to: Entropy – End of Silence (feat. Alexa Ray)

I watched the sunrise for the first time in a few years this morning.

The darkest part of night before the dawn. The way the sky turns black-blue and deepens in color. The shadows that grow darker, stiller, and then start to fade as the sun peeks over the horizon. The sky is dyed with a pale purple this morning shot through with golden clouds. It’s a moment of silence before the crows in my neighborhood start their morning. As of the time I write this (5:52am Pacific Standard Time), the sun is also blessing me with a direct shot into my face/eyes as it rises between two trees.

Thank you, sunlight, I appreciate you.

Grieving in Quarantine

There are people who come into our lives for a reason.

They may not stay long, you may pass one another by, and you may very well end up missing one another entirely by the time you realize just how much those people mean to you. But the impact they have on you and your life remains the same… regardless of how long or short their time was in your social sphere.

I lost a dear friend this week to complications of COVID-19.

He was 31 years old.

For those reading, there is a memorial fundraiser being hosted with 100% of the proceeds going to his wife and family. If you would like to donate, please check out the link here: Jacob Page Memorial Fund. If you are unable to, a share of the link would be appreciated or even just a kind word/moment of silence in his honor would suffice.

That said… let me tell you a little about him.

Brief Update

It’s been a few weeks since I’ve posted anything, and I am sorry about that.

A number of issues have come up and most of them have to do with an irritating physical issue that just refuses to heal up even though it’s been about a year of trying everything and anything possible to heal up. I’ve thrown in the towel and it’s time to go for the surgery in hopes it makes things better. That’s on Thursday and I’m actually looking forward to it– and that should be an indicator of how uncomfortable I’ve been.

The downside to feeling so poorly is that I have hit a rut/stopping point with Project Vanilla due to being in some goodly amount of pain and being exhausted on all fronts as a result. This is particularly frustrating for me as an author because I have everything I need ready and raring to go– except for the motivation and the ability to actually concentrate in order to write.

This, as you can imagine, is incredibly frustrating and disheartening.

But I’m also writing this from several thousand feet in the air on my way back from an amazing trip to Colorado to see my older brother (also known as my best and most cherished friend/one of my strongest pillars of support) and his amazing wife and family. It’s my first real vacation that I’ve been able to take where I’m not stressed beyond belief and could have a good time– even if the above mentioned health issue did rear up around the third day, much to my annoyance.

It was a lovely visit and far, far too short for my liking. I’m going to have to go back/fly him out to torment him more next time.

On the positive side, this plane ride has given me absolute freedom to try hammering out the rest of Project Vanilla, and with the resolution of my health issues looming in the very near future, I have high hopes of finishing the draft and sending it off for editing here in the next two weeks at the pace I’m going.

I, uh, just hope the anthology I’m submitting to is okay with a monster story this time around. It definitely smacks the ceiling on the 25,000 word limit. Maybe I’ll get lucky and my editor will completely destroy me and whack it down to about 17-20k?

I hope everyone is doing well and your own creative projects are coming along exactly as according to plan.

Cheers and stay healthy,

K.A. Crittenden